On Being Alone

12 Jul

Recently, I have had plentiful opportunities to remember what it’s like doing things on my own.  You’d have thought that 27 years alone was enough, but since we got married it seems I have spent even more time on my own! Fear not, we spend plenty of nights in watching Games of Thrones and hitting each other with dishtowels like normal couples. But it’s a different kind of alone time when Dotan goes on work trips abroad.

– Roald Dahl

When I was a single lass, I would contentedly spend lone afternoons shopping or wandering through museums, strolling around different parts of London or Tel Aviv, which would usually end with me happily sitting for hours in a coffee shop reading. Which I can obviously still do. But you live with someone you love for a while, you become an integral part of each others’ daily lives, and all that freeing, enjoyable ‘alone time’ becomes, instead, terribly lonely.

But like Matilda, I do still enjoy my own company. In a strange kind of rebellion which only I was aware of, I didn’t invite friends over for a sleepover, I didn’t invite people for shabbat, and I didn’t call anyone to tell them I was alone. I did double-lock the door every night, checked all the windows neurotically and spoke to myself out loud an awful lot.  On more than one occasion I found myself actually talking to the flat, which is proof that there can be too much alone time.  However, I managed to work on some creative things which I always put off. I cooked. I watched a lot of movies, walked around Pardes Chana in circles and read a lot of books. I learned that I can cope, even if I don’t like it. I learned that I like a schedule and being prepared in advance. I learned that pulling a heavy granny trolley from the supermarket in Israeli summer heat is a stupid idea, even at 6.30pm.  Luckily, it’s only a 12 minute walk to the flat or I would’ve had to lie down on the roadside and just let the cats eat me.

Alone time can give you great perspective, and an opportunity for reflection. Which may lead you to wonder why you got an awfully giant tattoo on your back.

It was a long month, and I’m glad it’s over.  Absence really does make the heart grow fonder, let me tell you. But saying that, this video made me smile. It’s good to know how to spend time alone. Just don’t get go getting too used to it.


Please leave a reply! Thanks - Dannii x

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